I Believe In Species Equality. Dogs Don’t Wipe Their Ass. Neither Do I.

For years, humanity has been plagued with various inequalities. Thankfully, the past century has been spent working to correct many of these inequalities. Women can vote. Black Americans count as more than 3/5th of a person. Gay Americans can be wed. However, there’s one area that we seem to be lacking in: Speciesism. 

“the unjustified disadvantageous consideration or treatment of those who are not classified as belonging to a certain species.”

Óscar Horta

Ask yourself, how much a year do you spend on toilet paper? Now, how much does your dog spend? Notice anything?

I believe in species equality. Dogs don’t wipe their ass. Neither do I.

Yep. Today marks three months without wiping my butt-crack. I have to say, it’s empowering. Sure, my underwear gets a little stained. And my shower water gets a tad discolored. But I finally no longer feel oppressed by the social construct that simply because I am human, I need to use toilet paper.

In addition to ass wiping, I have also ceased brushing my teeth. My next target: clothe wearing. Sadly, there are laws against that one and I have been diligently emailing my senator to get that utterly speciesist legislation changed.

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